I am a hopeless procrastinator. My wanderlust does not apply only to the outside world; the internet is a beautiful thing when a paper is due or I have a test or something else to distract myself from. A few days ago I found myself browsing websites selling couture waist training corsets, and other fashion-related monstrosities that would normally make my inner feminist gag. After a few more hours piddled away in front of my laptop, I realized that there must be a reason I was so suddenly fascinated by the chauvinistic world of women's fashions: I came to the conclusion that I've been denying myself the right to 'pretty' because I don't want to represent the oppression that 'pretty' has come to be.
To a girl who never felt 'pretty' (or particularly wanted to, for that matter), it's a weird position to actually find myself gazing in the mirror and trying to imagine myself fitting that narrow field of appearance. I discovered the pin-up style in my web wanderings, and I became enchanted by it. These women encompass 'pretty' in a way that takes their world's expectation of them and surpasses it: the culture of pin-up is pretty in spite of itself as a way for women to assert their feminine strength, and I, for one, fell in love with it.The culture surrounding pin-up today rings with much the same echo as before, sounding the bells of confident, sexy women in control and proud of their bodies and their lives. As I dug deeper into the 'look' of pin-up and how to achieve it, I realized that I've been using most of the main practices for the majority of the time I've been wearing makeup: shaping eyebrows a certain way, using a sheer eyeshadow and adding a little dark depth while lining the eye and accentuating thick lashes; contouring the face with a little blush and sporting a hot lip, with maybe a mole to hit the sexpot jackpot (I was lucky enough to have been born with a 'beauty mark' mole--one less dot of makeup used!). Hair is particular and fixed, out of the way and simultaneously shown off. Clothes work the curves! None of this 'glamazon' stick-thin business--as a busty girl, I can happily enjoy this aspect of the image.
To get down to brass tacks, pin-up girls put effort into their appearance because they are not ashamed to be women, even in a world that would admonish them for it. They accentuate their femininity, taking the time to be seen as they see fit, and taking care of their bodies so they can be more than comfortable in their skin.
More than just the look, though, is the attitude, and the attitude is confidence! A girl is just a pile of clothes and hair until she walks like she means it and reps the 'tude. Marilyn Monroe is a fabulous example of a woman who brings her confidence to her sexuality, and she did so with care and awareness, making her a model pin-up girl. A few websites I visited had particularly cool things to say about the confidence of a pin-up girl, and how to achieve it; I think it's worth sharing for anyone, not just for those of us seeking a life makeover.
Sure there a lot of kids you meet that are very outspoken and some who are very shy.
It does not mean however that if you're shy when you are young, you can't gain self-confidence.
This is one I can speak of personally. Being an extremely shy and quite child, I have grown to be one of the most outspoken and outgoing person I know.
So don't give up. Your chance can still come. If you want it to.
2. I had an extremely bad past - I can't possibly be confident.
Ok...lets face it...All people have gone through bad things. A confident person decided to move on. A non confident person dwells on that situation.
How about a lady who went through a terrible childhood - poverty, rape, racism...to become one of the most powerful people on earth - Oprah.
3. If You're Confident - You Are in All Areas Of Life...
Overall self-confidence is your belief in what you can do.
If you're a rocket scientist - you're certain in your knowledge about spacecrafts.
If you're a make up artist - you're certain in your knowledge about make up.
One way to create self-confidence is to find an area of life you feel you have mastered and duplicate the feelings for an area of life you want to improve in.
People with self-confidence walk quicker as they have important things to do and they don't have all day to do it.
Try it yourself...you will feel and look more confident.
2. Stand Up Straight
Taller people are proven to be naturally more confident.
By standing up straight, it gives the illusion you are taller and people that slouch always seem like they are doubting themselves.
Confident people don't doubt themselves.
3. Challenge Yourself
How can you feel better about yourself when you don't know what you are capable of?
By pushing your boundaries and succeeding you prove to yourself you are capable of achieving a lot - giving you more self-confidence.
In the instances you 'fail', by getting back up and trying again, you prove to yourself that you are stronger then you think.
Either way...it's a win win situation!
4. Compliment Others
Break the cycle of negativity and praise others. Gossip is dreadful. So do yourself a favour and stay clear of it.
By looking for the best in others you can also find the best in you. What you put out, you get back in. The more real compliments you give out, the more you will get.
5. Speak Up!
It takes true courage to speak up. And you surely get more confidence by standing up for what you believe in.
Try to speak up at least once in a social situation.
This does not mean that you have to fight with everyone, but just by putting in a sentence into a conversation will make a world of difference.
6. Exercise...
Oh come on...you didn't really think I wouldn't state the obvious did you?
Yes...look after yourself.
It makes you look better, feel better and gives you more energy.
By shedding a few kilos, or getting through a big workout, it helps you feel like you're able to achieve more increasing your self-confidence.
7. Watch What You Wear
Wear the right colours for you - if in doubt chose one of these 'universal' colours from below. Universal colours usually suit most people.
To make sure you get the extra *oomph* from those colours - wear either gold or silver jewellery, whichever suits you most.
You can determine this by putting the jewellery up to your face. If you looked tired when you have it near your face, the colour isn't right for you.
If you're still not sure…ask a friend. They will tell you the truth.
- Off-white (it looks best on warmer skin tones though)
- Ivory (not cream which is more suited for Autumns)
- Mid-gray
- Stone
- Taupe
- Pewter
- Teal
- Purple
- Emerald Turquoise
- Lavender
Fake It Till You Make It!
Yes...people don't really know the difference and by faking it for a while, soon it will come to you naturally.
Just like when you first started driving a car...it was tough.
After a while, it all came naturally.
So go out there and use these tips straight away.
There is nothing more attractive then a woman with self-confidence.
Goodluck!
[credit: http://www.pinuppassion.com/confidence.html ]
I've started trying to implement the tips into my life--today my goal was to walk 25% faster (mostly achieved!), tomorrow I'm going to try to add standing up straighter, and so on. I'll call this the Week of Pin-Up Confidence training. Also, it certainly doesn't hurt that yesterday I acquired a FABULOUS red lip color that screams pin-up!
I'm sure I'll develop some new ideas regarding a culture based primarily on aesthetics in the near future; however, for just now, I will be immensely happy with the knowledge that I am giving to myself
the gift of pretty.
<3
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